29 Years of Marriage And Counting

I have watched the television show 19 Kids and Counting from time to time. I have been married for 29 years and blessed with twins daughters who just turned 25 this past September. I am grateful to have experienced pregnancy once and to have been blessed with twins but I wouldn't want to go through it 19 and now 20 times like Michelle Duggar.
My husband and I just celebrated our 29th wedding anniversary on October 10th. I think back to the day that we got married. I remember that it was raining but some say getting married on a rainy day is cleansing, unifying and fertility-boosting whereas another theory is it represents the crying you will do during your marriage. There have been some tears during my marriage but I have had tears because of other events in my life which had nothing to do with the marriage. It is all in how you look at life which myth you want to believe.
I will be the first to say that there have been many ups and downs. I went through a mental breakdown of sorts about eight years ago. I moved to an appartment with our twin daughters. My husband was very upset at this decision. I couldn't stand physical contact at the time but eventually I came around. He never gave up on us and would come over to the appartment and take the girls and I out for supper. We now we refer to it as our little adventure. During that time my father passed away and six months later I inherited some family money and bought the condo beside the one he and I owned.
My husband owned six Dominos Pizza stores with a partner. He has Parkinson's disease which made his patner and an investor nervous. They bought him out as they felt he was a detriment to the company. It was a very difficult time for him but he still wanted to do something with his life. We heard of another store in a nearby area that was for sale. I thought that he should buy it which he did. This is where we really learned to work together as a team. I owned another business but would get involved on a Friday evening and over the weekend. We had a lot of staffing issues so there were some Friday evenings where I would take orders and he would make the pizzas. We had one driver working with us. It was a very long day for me but I got to enjoy the stop at the local truck stop at 4-5 am for breakfast before heading home to bed.
The store was a turnaround and we ran out of money before we could get it turned around into a profitable venture. It was a very sad day when we decided that we could no longer keep it open. We had an offer to purchase but I didn't want to sell as I had invested money from my family inheritance into the business. I should have allowed my husband to accept the offer because three months later I lost it all and then some. If only I had listened I could have saved some of my inheritance money. We now owe our in-laws money because they lent us money to keep going.
I am blessed to have such supportive in-laws. They have been there for us through difficult times. Next year they will be celebrating 60 years of marriage. It is a great milestone. My father-in-law is a retired minister. He worked in churches and my mother-in-law would play the piano supplying music during the service. She also helped him create the bulletin for each service. They did this together for many years working as a team. My father-in-law would do a lot of visting seniors in nursing homes and sometimes my mother-in-law would join him on these visits. I have always been amazed at how he could be standing at an elevator in a public building and start talking to someone. On one occasion many years ago we were in the local hospital visiting his younger brother who was there as a patient with cancer. When we left he started talking to this person at the elevator. My father-inlaw had worked in this hospital many years earlier before I knew him as an orderly. As we were heading to his vehicle I asked him if he knew the person from his days as an orderly at the hospital. He said no he had just met the person at the elevator. I said to him that I thought he knew the person because they had a great conversation going. I was surprised when he said that he wasn't always able to talk to strangers with ease. He is a master at putting people at ease.
My husband's daily struggle with Parkinson's has taught us how to work together. He is teaching me to wait for his signal to assist him in getting in and out of bed and chairs. I sometimes start pulling him before he is ready which puts a strain on my body. I am learning to wait until he tells me what he needs me to do. Our daughters are very good at knowing when he is overdue on his medication. They are very patient when it comes to waiting until he is ready to venture out of the house. There are times when leaving the house just doesn't work as his body is unco-operative.
It is sometimes hard to believe that we are in our fifties and dealing with an illness that make it seem like we are in our eighties. There are times where both of us feel sorry for our situation but a good nights sleep helps us realize that there are couples struggling with more challenges than us. Some men come back from serving their country with the lose of a limb. They have a long road of rehabilitation ahead of them. Our journey has been a slow progression of loss of movement over fourteen now into our fifteenth year. The walker is my husband's best assistant. He has even started trying out a wheelchair to give him more mobility.
So to all of those married couples I salute you for staying together when the going gets tough. I spent some of our married life threatening to walk-out when I didn't like how things were going. I have finally begun to realize that leaving is not going to solve anything but staying helps me grow into the person I am to become. MarriageQuote Snapshot_20121127_7 (2) Robert and Bethany Jobb
Our Motto: "The Best Is Yet To Come!" MTTBbannerad-300x250-blinkteam-wukarjpgTeam WUKAR- A group of people promoting the world's largest E-commerce direct selling company. Become a part of the E-commerce Revolution when you join Team WUKAR today.

Life Is Full Of Little Dissappointments

On Saturday mornings I take my daughter to work and carry on to visit a friend for a couple of hours while she is at work. We stop at a famous donut shop in Canada called Tim Horton's. We Canadians have shortened the name to Timmies. It was started by a hockey player named Tim Horton in 1964 with the first store opening in Hamilton, Ontario.
Tim Hortons LogoThis morning, I ordered an extra large steeped tea with two cream as this is my hot drink of choice. I have never been a coffee drinker but do enjoy their steeped tea. I also ordered a honey cruller donut and a chocolate chip muffin for my daughter. When we got to our vehicle I was contemplating where to get my long-time friend some breakfast. She had called me last night asking if I would bring her something. The donut shop has breakfast sandwiches similar to McDonald's egg Mcmuffin. My friend wanted more of a typical style breakfast so I decided against what was available at Tim's. I sat in the car and the lot beside us had McDonald's. I knew that they had what they call The Big Breakfast so I decided that I would get that for my friend. I could tell that my daughter didn't want to be late for her job which starts at 9:00 a.m. so I decided to drive on and find one closer to my friends house. There is always a McDonald's on main intersections.
McDonalds LogoI got to a stop sign and decided to start eating my donut as I was feeling a little hungry. To my surprise it was a honey glazed donut in the bag instead of honey cruller. I was dissappointed as my taste buds were looking forward to the cruller. Both of these donuts have a glaze on them so why my dissappoinment? The cruller is a different texture which is why I prefer it to the honey glazed. I was annoyed at the mistake made by the staff but of course I wasn't about to go back and get what I had ordered as my daughter had to be at work by 9:00 a.m.
I dropped my daughter outside of her workplace and carried on to my friend's house all the while trying to think of the nearest McDonald's to her home. Two came to my mind so I turned at the lights to the one closest to her house. I went in and ordered her breakfast. The staff said that the hash brown had 45 more seconds before it was ready. I stood there waiting patiently while he served another customer. He brought out the breakfast of scrambled eggs, sausage and an english muffin. It was in a styrofoam container with a nice lid on it. I had asked for extra strawberry jam which he had kindly put on top. I headed out the door. I got into my vehicle and started driving towards my friends house. I suddenly realized that I had not gotten the hash brown. This was the second time that morning that something had not gone as planned. I decided that it was not worth turning around and going back for a hash brown. I hoped that maybe the staff would eat it but I don't know the store policy. It is probably not allowed.
I decided on my drive to my friend's house that I wasn't going to let these minor inconveniences ruin my day even though each time I realized something hadn't gone as planned I was left with a feeling of irritation. My friend was really appreciative that I took the time to bring her some breakfast. She has a lot of health challenges so doesn't enjoy eating food all that much at times. She was enjoying my breakfast which made me feel good. It always does feel good to do something for someone else.
The events of the morning made me ponder how often in the past I have let minor inconveniences ruin my day. I have written about my daily life in previous blog posts but for those of you who are reading this blog post for the first time my husband suffers from Parkinson's disease. It is a daily battle not knowing from moment to moment how mobile he will be. He is in his fifteenth year with the disease and this year we have seen his health decline the most. He suffers from joint discomfort and the toes in his feet tend to curl inward which makes walking difficult. He moves around with the aid of a walker 99% of the time. He does venture out without it but it is generally not a good idea as he could get stuck somewhere in his travels as his body will stiffen up like a board. We try to stay within hearing distance so he can call for our help if needed. He keeps a bell near him and will ring us if he needs help or it is time to take his medication.
Caring for his needs has become a family project between myself and my twin daughters. I feel that we do a pretty good job and he acknowledges that he is fortunate enough to have us there for him. His illness has helped me see what is most important in life and to work on focussing on the important things in life and not get caught up in the minor inconveniences. When you see knew him when hecould flip a pizza into the air at his workplace to know not being able to manipulate cutlery it can be very upsetting. He becomes frustrated with the change in his physcial abilities but takes it day to day. I am lucky that he still looks for opportunities to raise the family's lifestyle as he is no longer able to work outside of the house. TogetherWeMakeAFamilyEvery day is a blessing because we don't know how much longer we have with each other. I realize that it is like that for any family but when you see a physical decline in someone that you love it is difficult. Going on outings has to be planned and sometimes postponed if his body is being unco-operative that particular day or moment in the day. We had an appointment at the bank and twice had to cancel because we couldn't get his shoes on to get into the car. We were wanting to have me added onto his bank account because for many years I have been doing his banking but have not been an official account holder. It was recommended by our life insurance agent that we do this as it is difficult to get things taken care of if something were to happen and we have bills that are paid out of his account. If someone does die, the account is frozen unless it is joint.
I have made some very bad financial decisions but I did take his advice so that we are ready for any more changes that might take place. Are you ready for changes in your life? Change is inevitable and as we age it becomes important to be prepared. My husband was diagnosed with Parkinson's at the age of 43 which is young but our daughter who is 25 is showing signs that she too may have Parkinson's.
Enjoy the time that you have as a family as life may throw you some curve balls. Snapshot_20121127_7 (2)Robert and Bethany Jobb Our Motto: "The Best Is Yet To Come!" MTTBbannerad-300x250-blink team-wukarjpgA group of people bringing the Ecommerce Revolution to consumers worldwide.

The Right To Die With Dignity

The Criminal Code of Canada states in section 241 that: "Every one who (a) counsels a person to commit suicide, or (b) aids or abets a person to commit suicide, whether suicide ensues or not, is guilty of an indictable offence and liable to imprisonment for a term not exceeding fourteen years." Suicide hasn't been a crime in Canada since 1972 but someone who is disabled from a debilitating disease like ALS or MS is not allowed to assist anyone in suicide. I don't know your position as a reader on this topic. I had not given it any thought until my husband was diagnosed with Parkinson's disease. Rob has had the disease for over 14 years. The disease progresses slowly so the first 5 years don't affect your life that significantly. You notice some decline in movement but over the past 10 years the disease has progressed and now in his 15th year he is confined in his movements. He no longer has the fine motor skills that he once enjoyed. Using the keyboard to manipulate the computer is difficult. He uses a walker to get around and needs assistance with dressing and getting in and out of bed and chairs. It is a big change from being able to do anything you want whenever you want to having to determine if your body will co-operate enough to go out for groceries. Rob says that it is hard to lose abilities to do things that you took for granted. At times he has said that he doesn't want to keep going because his life has changed so much. He gets up to face another day. We both now have an appreciation for someone who suffers even more than Rob with daily living. Until you are living with someone who is suffering from a neurological disorder you do not have a total appreciation for their condition. It is taxing to the person with the disorder and the family or persons who are helping them with daily living. There are periods of depression by the patient and the care givers. There is a feeling of entrapment by the disorder. You are constantly on guard in case the patient needs assistance. In our case Rob has a bell that he keeps near him that he rings when he needs assistance. Twenty-one years ago Sue Rodriguez was suffering from ALS. in 1991, she went to court to get the right to die in an assisted suicide. She said that she had a right to determine how she died. Her request was denied. In 1994, she took her own life with the assistance of an anonymous doctor. A member of the NDP party in Canada who had helped fight her case was with her when she died. In 1998 there was a movie written about her story At The End Of The Day: The Sue Rodrigeuz Story. suerodrigeuz Gloria Taylor also went to court to get permission for assisted suicide. Gloria was 61 years of age when she was diagnosed with ALS. She was told that she would be paralyzed within six month and die within a year. She decided to fight back and was granted the right to ask for doctor assisted suicide when she deemed it necessary. She died unexpectedly in 2012 from an infection. gloria_taylor(15) The famous cosmologist Stephen Hawking has suffered with ALS since he was 21. He agrees with assisted suicide if someone is in pain and the people that assist should not prosecuted. He suffered with pneumonia and was put on life support. His wife was given the choice to switch off the machines but he did not want that. He says that in his line of work have a disability is not a handicap. It is all in the mind. Hawking's advice is to focus on what you can do and not regret what you cannot do. StephenHawking Living on a daily basis with someone that has limited physical capabilities has given me a new perspective on life. Rob has tried working with voice activated devices without success. The tone of his voice is low which is a condition of Parkinson's so the voice activated software does not accurately decipher what he is saying. It pains me to watch him stuck in a chair with his arms glued to the sides. He starts to shake as he concentrates on freeing himself from this position. He has an external keyboard to use with his computer but as of late his fingers get frozen in one position as he tries to type. He has a great attitude about his condition taking it moment by moment but there are days when he is not able to do much beyond sit in his chair. He helps me determine the best way to build business online. We have a family motto - "The Best Is Yet To Come!" I can totally empathize with people going through a debilitating disease needing the right to choose whether they live another day. People put their pets to sleep if they are suffering so why should it be any different for a human. Is it something that I would encourage no but if the person suffering has no quality of life than it definetely needs to be a decision that they should be allowed to make. I like the quote walk a mile in my shoes before you pass judgement on their decisions. You may not agree with their decision but you can be supportive if they are doing it with conviction. walkamileinmyshoes Thank-you for visting this blog and I hope that I have left you with some food for thought. I follow the posts of a successful internet marketer. Today he posted about taking 7 books off of his book shelf twice a week. He allows himself 3 minutes per book to scan through it looking for new knowledge. He calls it Ultra Reading. After he has gone through all seven then he goes for a run outside or to the gym with his mind buzzing. He begins his creative work for the day when he returns to his office. I take a similar approach looking on Google to see what topics are trending and then start to write a blog post around that topic and weaving my personal life into the post if it has some relevance to the topic. Some days it takes me all day to write the post coming back to it as I do other things. Snapshot_20121127_7 (2) Robert and Bethany Jobb Our Motto: "The Best Is Yet To Come!" MTTBbannerad-300x250-blink team-wukarjpgTEAM WUKAR:  A group of people bringing the Ecommerce Revolution to consumers worldwide.

Being Thankful For My Life

In 1879 Thanksgiving was declared a national holiday in Canada and celebrated on a Thursday in November. The date changed several times and in 1957, parliament declared the second Monday of October the official holiday. We just celebrated Thanksgiving in Canada this past weekend. I debated about doing a traditional dinner. I had an idea to spread out the preparation into two days to make it less work on the day I cooked the turkey. The meal was planned for Monday the 13th so on Sunday the 12th I cooked up my sweet potatoes and squash. My mother-in-law taught me to peel the skin off of these vegetables. This is so much easier than digging out the contents from the skin. In the evening I made the pumpkin pie. When Sunday came I just had to shred the bread for the stuffing and mix in the spices. I then stuffed the turkey and put it into the oven. This approach to making dinner was more relaxing. My guests arrived as I was preparing the last few items for the meal. We took the pre-cooked vegetables from the refrigerator and finished preparing them for the table. I even decided to experiment and bought a third vegetable. I have not eaten turnips since I lived at home. I love the ability to ask Google how to prepare something. I found a site with about 3 methods and decided to cut them into french fry style pieces. We tossed them in oil and included diced onion as recommended. We kept turning them so they browned on all sides. They were then put in a bowl and onto the table. It was fun to try cooking something new. I feel that it is very important to be grateful for things in life. Our family is dealing with a member who has Parkinson's disease and at times I must admit that I feel trapped with having to care for them. When it is really strong, I will stop and start writing out the things that I am grateful for in my life. This helps me to refocus my thinking. I try to do this daily but sometimes get distracted from this exercise. I also will watch some music videos because music is very uplifting. Here is a tribute to the rock group Led Zepplin done at the Kennedy Centre that I will watch from time to time to lift my spirits. I hope that you enjoy it too. http://youtu.be/w9g3J-p4b2Q I look out into the world and see countries who are dealing with terrorists coming into their cities and causing havoc. Their lives are disrupted and many people are killed as the terrorists take over. I cannot truly imagine what life must be like in these places. There are mass executions, abductions and torture. Women are forced into slavery. People leave their homes to get away from the terrorists. It is upsetting to hear of these events which makes my situation pale in comparison. Another tragedy in the world is the ebola crisis in West Africa. It is killing about 7 in every 10 people infected. There is a reduction in new cases for areas hardest hit in early 2014. The disease is spreading in a broader geographic area, including along the border with Ivory Coast  To date their have been 4,447 deaths and 8,914 suspected or confirmed cases. Numbers of cases are expected to rise to 5,000 to 10,000 cases in Liberia, Sierra Leone and Guinea by December 1st. The World Health Organization has a goal to have 70% of the burials done safely and 70% of the people infected receiving treatment. They feel this will curb the spread of the virus. At present there are 1,000 new cases in the past 3-4 weeks which appears that it is under control from earlier in the year. The best way that I can help is to pray for world peace. Some people may not believe in prayer but I believe that is does help. I say thanks for many things throughout my day. Money will arrive just as a bill is due. I am working on my mindset towards money so that it flows to me easily and effortlessly. I have suffered with a belief that I will not have enough. I even said to my husband last night that we are out of money and as I made this statement I stopped myself and said you are not of money. Money always shows up when it is needed and when it does I say "Thank-you" to God or Universe for the arrival of the money when needed to cover a bill. I visuallze in my mind having $50k in my savings account at all times. I walk around the house and remind myself to give thanks for the $50k in my savings account. It is not there but it will be because I am professing it to be so with an attitude of gratitude. I watched a You Tube video quite a while ago from a woman that does tapping. She taps on the energy merdians in her body and affirms that she is receiving and accepting $50k into her life. I started watching this video regularly to train my mind to accept this amount of money into my life. Just search on You Tube for Margaret M. Lynch and you can watch this video. She now has 2 videos on receiving 50k into your life and I will watch both of them some days. There is always something in our lives that we can be thankful for when we stop and reflect. Taking a day out of our lives to break bread with family and friends allows us the opportuniity to express our gratitude for the blessings in our life. I now work from home and am grateful for the people that I have met on Facebook and other social media sites. I have recently connected with a group of people that have formed a team calling themselves WUKAR which stands for Wake Up Kick Ass and Repeat. This is an apt description for my life. I needed to wake up to the fact that I had to change how I viewed money. I am making progress and while I do this I will kick ass on the poverty thinking that I have had for many years. I will keep working on my mindset as it can slip back easily so I have to be surround myself with books,videos and people that are in life where I want to go. At team WUKAR we are promoting an ecommerce revolution that will change how people shop online. There are similar programs out there but we have a global presence and a team of leaders that want is all to succeed. I am so grateful for this team coming into my life to inspire me to be the best me that I can be. team-wukarjpg     Snapshot_20121127_7 (2) Robert and Bethany Jobb
 Our Motto "The Best Is Yet To Come!"
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No Excuses – Life With No Limits

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I was sitting in the living room with the laptop on my knee, as I often do. My husband Rob was watching something and I heard them talk about a wrestler with no arms or legs. I wasn`t sure that I had heard it right. I googled - `wrestler with no arms or legs expecting to come up with nothing. Much to my surprise I got the name Kyle Maynard. When he was born his parents decided that they would let him figure out how to do things. They never treated him as handicapped so he didn`t see himself that way either. He learned how to feed himself and write. At the age of 11 he decided that he wanted to become a wrestler. His mother contacted the coach of Collins Hill High School about coaching her son. The coach had worked with someone who had lost a leg so quickly said that they could work with her son. She insisted that the coach needed to listen to her explain her son`s condition. He didn`t think that he could do anything for Kyle but told her to bring him in. He saw how serious Kyle was about doing this so he personally coached him. No one had ever won a match that had no upper limbs. For the first year and a half Kyle lost all of his matches. He wanted to quit but his father would not let him. He videotaped his matches and Kyle would have to watch them to review his errors. He then would spend hours in the basement fixing his errors. Kyle`s father said that he fought only well enough to lose. These are words to ponder as that is how many of us approach life. We do enough to get by but not enough to excel. We have some success but sometimes our lack of fear holds us back from unlimited success. It is important to surround yourself with people who are more successful than you. They can inspire you to do more and go farther than you ever have before. Kyle had to retrain his mind when he arrived at a hotel room for a speaking engagement to not just hop on the bed and watch tv. He wanted to go to the hotel gym but it wasn't happening. He started turning on some motivational music in the elevator on the way up to his room. This got him motivated to drop his bags and head for the gym. I can totally relate with not feeling motivated to do something that I should do so I like his approach of listening to something motivating to inspire him to go do what he needs to do . Finding his story has got me motivated to push myself to go for goals that I didn't feel I could reach. Kyle like many of us has suffered with depression. In 2006, he says that he called his mother in the airport on one of his speaking engagement trips. He said that he wanted to quit speaking. He was feeling like a fraud. His mother said that she would support his decision but sounded disappointed. After he rung up the phone he saw two guys looking at him. He went over to talk to them as he always did when he was out. Their meeting changed his life. They were former military police who had suffered major burns from a roadside bomb and ambush in Iraq. They had made a suicide pact lying in hospital beds not looking forward to the rehabilitation process. A week later they saw Kyle on tv  and called it off. In 2012 he hiked Mount Kilimanjaro bear crawling 19,340 feet to the roof of Africa. He wanted to prove that you can overcome any obstacles even with a disability.He spread the ashes of a wounded solider at the top of the mountain. Some American service personnel suffering from shrapnel wounds, post traumatic stress and traumatic brain injury joined him in the climb. He did the climb in 10 days. Kyle now knows his purpose and says that when you know your purpose in life you can go through anything it takes to get there. We all need to find our "why" and once you do Kyle says that there are no good excuses. My husband has Parkinson's disease so I often get caught up with his care or feel drained from being his caregiver. I am thinking of ways to keep myself motivated even when I feel drained to do something to promote myself and my business. I like twitter because you can put out a quick message about yourself, the events of the day.or a motivational quote. team-wukarjpg I have found a group of people who are inspiring me to go farther than I ever have before. They are a group of winners and are eager to help all of their members reach their full potential. The leader Matt Trainer is an awesome SEO marketer. He has helped well known marketers like Frank Kern to greater success. Matt was introduced to a membership program that offers cashback for online purchases. He doesn't like multi level marketing but saw the potential of this program. It is built on offering customers the opportunity to continue shopping at their usual retailers like Home Depot, Best Buy and Walmart but receiving cashback when they shop online. You can even pick up your purchase at your local store. It offers music playlists from your favorite artists, entertainment videos, talk radio stations and a gaming platform. Snapshot_20121127_7 (2) Robert and Bethany Jobb
Our Motto "The Best Is Yet To Come!"
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