Accentuate The Positive – Whale Done!

I take my daughter to a reading class. While she is with her reading tutor for an hour I also take a book to read. I started to read a book called "Whale Done" written by Ken Blanchard.
In this book Wes a manager at a company decided to attend a show at Sea World. He was amazed at how well the trainers and whales interacted with each other. The whales do lots of acrobatic activities for the audience. He waited until the show was over and then decided to ask a trainer how they can get a 2 ton whale to entertain the audience so well.
Seaworld-Killer-Whale-Show Seaworld-Killer-WhalesThe trainer took him behind the scenes and explained their approach. Of course you cannot reprimand an animal of that size.The trainer said that they accentuate the positive. The trainer explained to Wes that the more you accentuate the negative behaviour the more it will be repeated. If you focuss on what is being done right then it will get done right more often. They develop a friendship with the killer whales. They take the time to understand each whale individually and create the training into a game.
If a whale is not doing what the trainer wants then they redirect the whales attention back to the task at hand or to something that they are good at doing. If the whale does the assigned task then they are rewarded. Sometimes it is with food but other times it is by rubbing their head as they like to be rubbed and touched. The food reward meant that the whale had to be kept hungry to perform well which is not healthy for the animal. Many of us are motivated  by words of encouragement or even a physical contact like the whales as much as financial reward.
If you are taking the redirection approach you need to describe the error or problem as soon as possible, but never putting blame on the person. It may be that you need to take the blame for not making the task clear. A current example in our home was my husband's daily drug regime. He decided that we needed to create a chart to keep track of the three drugs that he takes throughout the day. I created the spreadsheet and my daughters and I were in charge of writing down the time that we gave him each drug. We didn't explain clearly to the girls where to fill in the time. The spreadsheet was set up in six columns because he takes one drug six times a day. We were to go across the page with the times but we did not communicate this to our daughters. They started writing the times down the sheet instead of across. Once my husband noticed their mistake he took ownership of the fact that we hadn't explained to them where to put in the time. He commended them for writing down the time and then explained it needed to go across the page and not down. This is a great example of redirection or Whale Done approach. He went over the task in detail until he knew that they understood where he needed them to put down the time he gave them each drug. He expressed confidence and trust in their ability to do it the right way going forward.
It is more motivating to get a Whale Done. It is amazing how often we don't verbally express our appreciation for someone's efforts. We are quick to criticize someone for not meeting our expectations. I remember a boss I had at one of my jobs said that I was great at coming up with ideas but everyone else had to do the work. I was offended by his comment because I was spending extra hours at the workplace outside of what I was being paid organizing an area that had been under neglect for many years.
I am a systems person so I was putting things together that were the same. For example, there were lots of writing pens of different colours and styles. I put them all together so I could review how many that I had of each. After a few days I had the items that were alike together so I could take stock of how much of each of something I had in inventory. This saved the company money because I would not have to order it if someone in the office or factory needed it. I took great pride in getting the many items that were spread across many shelves condensed into a smaller area with like items together.
Eventually my efforts did get recognized by my boss and his peers. My Whale Done was in a raise in my salary. It felt good as I had been told that there was no money for raises. I asked my bosses's boss how I had gotten a raise when there was no money. His response was that there is always money somewhere that can be accessed if it is deemed important.
It is human nature to look for someone doing something wrong rather than something right. I have caught myself getting irritated with my daughters when they don't do a household chore when asked. There are times I have not given them a timeline on the task so it is my fault when it doesn't get done by a certain time. I know for myself it helps if I write down what I  need to do and check it off when done. We all get so busy with our day to day lives that things get forgotten.
I listened to a webinar where the speaker said to block off your time into segments of 15 minutes. You sit down to do something in that 15 minute period. He even suggested setting a timer that rings at the 15 minute time. He then says to stop and take a 5 minute break. I was thinking that a break wasn't necessary but he explained that you are fresh after a 5 minute break and get more done in your next 15 minutes. To me this is accentuating a postive work habit like the Whale Done relationship approach.
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Robert and Bethany Jobb
Our Motto: "The Best Is Yet To Come!"


Evolving from the ancient Celtic holiday of Samhain, modern Halloween has become less about literal ghosts and ghouls and more about costumes and candy. The Celts used the day to mark the end of the harvest season and the beginning of winter, and also believed that this transition between the seasons was a bridge to the world of the dead.  Over the millennia the holiday transitioned from a somber pagan ritual to a day of merriment, costumes, parades and sweet treats for children and adults.
According to many scholars, All Hallows' Eve is a Christianized feast initially influenced by Celtic harvest festivals, with possible pagan roots, particularly the Gaelic Samhain. Other scholars maintain that it originated independently of Samhain and has solely Christian roots.
Typical festive Halloween activities include trick-or-treating (or the related "guising"), attending costume parties, decorating, carving pumpkins into jack-o'-lanterns, lighting bonfires, apple bobbing, visiting haunted house attractions, playing pranks, telling scary stories and watching horror films. In many parts of the world, the Christian religious observances of All Hallows' Eve, including attending church services and lighting candles on the graves of the dead, remain popular, although in other locations, these solemn customs are less pronounced in favor of a more commercialized and secularized celebration. Because many Western Christian denominations encourage, although most no longer require, abstinence from meat on All Hallows' Eve, the tradition of eating certain vegetarian foods for this vigil day developed, including the consumption of apples, colcannon, cider, potato pancakes, and soul cakes.
trick-or-treat-HalloweenHalloween is a night when children dress up and go door to door trick or treating. It is great to pretend for a few hours that you are someone else. It is like we can all make believe like we did when we were young children. Boys will dress up in a Superman or Spiderman costume. The Ninja turtles costume are also very popular for boys. Girls dress up as princesses from Disney movies. Popular for both boys and girls are The Power Ranger costumes from the television show. About 25% of the adult population are expected to dress up for Halloween.
The practice of dressing up in costumes and begging door to door for treats on holidays goes back to the Middle Ages, and includes Christmas wassailing. Trick-or-treating resembles the late medieval practice of "souling," when poor folk would go door to door on Hallowmas (November 1), receiving food in return for prayers for the dead on All Souls Day (November 2). It originated in Ireland and Britain, although similar practices for the souls of the dead were found as far south as Italy. Shakespeare mentions the practice in his comedy The Two Gentlemen of Verona (1593), when Speed accuses his master of "puling [whimpering, whining], like a beggar at Hallowmas."
In Mexico and other Latin American countries, Día de los Muertos—the Day of the Dead—honors deceased loved ones and ancestors. In Mexico, Latin America and Spain, All Souls’ Day, which takes place on November 2, is commemorated with a three-day celebration that begins on the evening of October 31. The celebration is designed to honor the dead who, it is believed, return to their earthly homes on Halloween. Many families construct an altar to the dead in their homes to honor deceased relatives and decorate it with candy, flowers, photographs, samples of the deceased’s favorite foods and drinks, and fresh water. Often, a wash basin and towel are left out so that the spirit can wash before indulging in the feast.
When I was growing up my mother didn't allow us to go trick or treating. She would host a party with our neighbour kids at some point around the Halloween time period. We would go apple bobbing which was always lots of fun. There was candy and other goodies for all to enjoy. If my memory serves me right she would make a fruit punch. I remember that we had a punch bowl and glasses that hung around the edge of the bowl. There was a big ladle and I enjoyed serving people the punch.
applebobbingWe lived in the country so our neighbours didn't live next door like they do in the city. Parents would have to bring the kids to our house and there would be a set time that the party was over. My mother had rules when you attended our house that had to be followed. She had no problem with letting a parent know that if the child was out of line they would have to go home. It never happened because the kids had a lot of respect for my mother as they knew that her rules meant that they were loved.
My parents raised beef cattle. They would buy young calves and feed them until they were ready to go to market. Every fall they would go to Western Canada and attend auctions where the ranchers would sell their calves. Sometimes they were not home on October 31st. One year my mother's mother who we called Nanny suggested that I come into her place for Halloween. She wanted me to go out trick or treating in the small town of Goderich. I went out to the streets around where she lived. I didn't like trick or treating. There were street lights on so it was not pitch black like in the country where I lived. I asked her if we could go back to her house. She was surprised that I didn't want to stay out longer.
When my daughters were young we lived in a condo complex. They liked handing out candy to the trick or treaters at the door. I decided that I should take them around the complex trick or treating. Like myself halfway through the complex they said that they wanted to go home. They didn't like the dark either even though they had grown up in the complex since they were born.
At the end of the 90's, Halloween moved more indoors. One of the reasons was to make it safer for children. Malls will open and offer trick-or-treating events. Kids in costume get candy and coupons. They have games, activities and clowns will be in attendance to make it more special. Many neighbourhoods have parties like my mother did when I was younger so there is less chance of mischief and to protect the trick or treators.
It is estimated that about 25% of American adults will dress up for Halloween. Some will have house parties to celebrate the occasion. Spooky costumes are the most popular purchase for an adult party. Retailers rake in lots of dollars from people decorating the inside and outside of their homes and costumes.
In Canada, adults between the age of 18-34 are expected to spend $75.00 with $25.00 of that money on a costume. There is pressure to have the best candy which raises the cost for the consumer.
Dressing up and having fun is what will make your Halloween night delightful!
Snapshot_20121127_7 (2)Robert and Bethany Jobb
Out Motto: "The Best Is Yet To Come!"

A Cure For Bed Head.

In certain parts of the world, people shower at night. They don't want to go to bed dirty which keeps their bed sheets cleaner for longer. In North America, a lot of people shower when they get up in the morning to wake themselves up.
As your life gets more hectic while raising a family or rushing to get to class in the morning it sometimes makes more sense to shower in the evening. In some households there is one bathroom shared between family members which makes it difficult for everyone to shower in the morning with school and work deadlines. If you have a young family it may be easier to shower in the evening when someone is available to watch the baby for you. It is all a matter of people's personal preference and daily schedules.
I find water relaxing so I will take either a bath or shower to help my body relax from a stressful day. If I get my hair wet I have to make sure that it dries completely before my head hits the pillow or I wake up with "bed head". Do you suffer from bed head too? One look in the mirror and I think that I am auditioning for a Friday the 13th movie role.
Bad-Hair-DayThe definition of bed head is a casual hairstyle resulting from failure to comb or arrange the hair after sleep. I am sure that we have all suffered from bed head from time to time. I read that certain types of fabrics, sleep positioning and temperatures can also contribute to waking up with bed head.
During hot humid days my hair will become all frizzy and unmanageable. I have spoken to other women who say that they have the same problem. This too could make me a candidate for a Friday the 13th movie role. It usually requires re-styling throughout the day to make me feel better and look human. My hair will become frizzy if I work around hot water too long too. Frizzy-HairThe other day my husband was watching an episode of the American reality tv show Shark Tank where enterpreneurs pitch the sharks on their business. We like watching the show to see which products the sharks invest in. In this particular episode, Max Valverde, came out of the double doors. His hair was tousled which surprised the sharks. He said that he was the creator of Morninghead. He showed the sharks his product which was a shower cap. Max talked about liking to be active and work-out after a day at work. He would come home, shower and then go to bed. The next morning he would wake up with  "bed head". He would proceed to the sink to wet his hair and restyle it. He said he could never get the hair on the back of this head wet and there was always water everywhere. This lead to the creation of his product Morninghead.
Here is a demonstration of how Morninghead works.
Morninghead-InstructionsMorninghead is a time and water saver for people on the go. You just have to wring the cap and then turn the cap inside out to let it dry until the next use. It is hand or machine washable on the delicate cycle and lasts three months if used every day or six months if used lesss frequently.
You can wet your hair with a towel or facecloth but your hands and arms tend to get wet too. Morninghead holds six times its weight in water without dripping which makes it convenient to use even when you are fully dressed.
You can wet your hair with a spray bottle like they do in hair salons but it only wets the surface of your hair which makes it less effective. When my hair is sprayed at the salon the water drips down the back of my neck and onto my face. If I am wearing makeup the mascara may start to run down my cheeks if it is not waterproof.
Putting your head under the faucet at the sink leaves lots of water around the sink and often times onto the mirror. This just creates more work to clean up the mess after you are done and if you are in a hurry 9 times out of 10 the water stays on the counter until it air dries and leaves spots on your bathroom mirror.
The product is most effective if you hair is less than shoulder length. Women use the product if they have a bob or shorter hair style. Some women with longer hair have used it but say it takes a couple of applications to get the hair wet.
This would make a great gag gift for Christmas or someone's birthday.n One customer bought it for his brother as a birthday gift. He woke up late to work one morning and used it to cure his bed head. He was very impressed with the product. He had to purchase another one for his brother.
For US customers place your order HERE for morninghead.
For Canadian customer place your order HERE for morninghead.
For International customers please send an email to and put the words morninghead in the subject line.
Snapshot_20121127_7 (2)Robert and Bethany Jobb
Our Motto: "The Best Is Yet To Come!"
MTTBbannerad-300x250-blink   team-wukarjpg   TEAM WUKAR: A group of people bringing the Ecommerce Revolution with consumers worldwide.

29 Years of Marriage And Counting

I have watched the television show 19 Kids and Counting from time to time. I have been married for 29 years and blessed with twins daughters who just turned 25 this past September. I am grateful to have experienced pregnancy once and to have been blessed with twins but I wouldn't want to go through it 19 and now 20 times like Michelle Duggar.
My husband and I just celebrated our 29th wedding anniversary on October 10th. I think back to the day that we got married. I remember that it was raining but some say getting married on a rainy day is cleansing, unifying and fertility-boosting whereas another theory is it represents the crying you will do during your marriage. There have been some tears during my marriage but I have had tears because of other events in my life which had nothing to do with the marriage. It is all in how you look at life which myth you want to believe.
I will be the first to say that there have been many ups and downs. I went through a mental breakdown of sorts about eight years ago. I moved to an appartment with our twin daughters. My husband was very upset at this decision. I couldn't stand physical contact at the time but eventually I came around. He never gave up on us and would come over to the appartment and take the girls and I out for supper. We now we refer to it as our little adventure. During that time my father passed away and six months later I inherited some family money and bought the condo beside the one he and I owned.
My husband owned six Dominos Pizza stores with a partner. He has Parkinson's disease which made his patner and an investor nervous. They bought him out as they felt he was a detriment to the company. It was a very difficult time for him but he still wanted to do something with his life. We heard of another store in a nearby area that was for sale. I thought that he should buy it which he did. This is where we really learned to work together as a team. I owned another business but would get involved on a Friday evening and over the weekend. We had a lot of staffing issues so there were some Friday evenings where I would take orders and he would make the pizzas. We had one driver working with us. It was a very long day for me but I got to enjoy the stop at the local truck stop at 4-5 am for breakfast before heading home to bed.
The store was a turnaround and we ran out of money before we could get it turned around into a profitable venture. It was a very sad day when we decided that we could no longer keep it open. We had an offer to purchase but I didn't want to sell as I had invested money from my family inheritance into the business. I should have allowed my husband to accept the offer because three months later I lost it all and then some. If only I had listened I could have saved some of my inheritance money. We now owe our in-laws money because they lent us money to keep going.
I am blessed to have such supportive in-laws. They have been there for us through difficult times. Next year they will be celebrating 60 years of marriage. It is a great milestone. My father-in-law is a retired minister. He worked in churches and my mother-in-law would play the piano supplying music during the service. She also helped him create the bulletin for each service. They did this together for many years working as a team. My father-in-law would do a lot of visting seniors in nursing homes and sometimes my mother-in-law would join him on these visits. I have always been amazed at how he could be standing at an elevator in a public building and start talking to someone. On one occasion many years ago we were in the local hospital visiting his younger brother who was there as a patient with cancer. When we left he started talking to this person at the elevator. My father-inlaw had worked in this hospital many years earlier before I knew him as an orderly. As we were heading to his vehicle I asked him if he knew the person from his days as an orderly at the hospital. He said no he had just met the person at the elevator. I said to him that I thought he knew the person because they had a great conversation going. I was surprised when he said that he wasn't always able to talk to strangers with ease. He is a master at putting people at ease.
My husband's daily struggle with Parkinson's has taught us how to work together. He is teaching me to wait for his signal to assist him in getting in and out of bed and chairs. I sometimes start pulling him before he is ready which puts a strain on my body. I am learning to wait until he tells me what he needs me to do. Our daughters are very good at knowing when he is overdue on his medication. They are very patient when it comes to waiting until he is ready to venture out of the house. There are times when leaving the house just doesn't work as his body is unco-operative.
It is sometimes hard to believe that we are in our fifties and dealing with an illness that make it seem like we are in our eighties. There are times where both of us feel sorry for our situation but a good nights sleep helps us realize that there are couples struggling with more challenges than us. Some men come back from serving their country with the lose of a limb. They have a long road of rehabilitation ahead of them. Our journey has been a slow progression of loss of movement over fourteen now into our fifteenth year. The walker is my husband's best assistant. He has even started trying out a wheelchair to give him more mobility.
So to all of those married couples I salute you for staying together when the going gets tough. I spent some of our married life threatening to walk-out when I didn't like how things were going. I have finally begun to realize that leaving is not going to solve anything but staying helps me grow into the person I am to become. MarriageQuote Snapshot_20121127_7 (2) Robert and Bethany Jobb
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Life Is Full Of Little Dissappointments

On Saturday mornings I take my daughter to work and carry on to visit a friend for a couple of hours while she is at work. We stop at a famous donut shop in Canada called Tim Horton's. We Canadians have shortened the name to Timmies. It was started by a hockey player named Tim Horton in 1964 with the first store opening in Hamilton, Ontario.
Tim Hortons LogoThis morning, I ordered an extra large steeped tea with two cream as this is my hot drink of choice. I have never been a coffee drinker but do enjoy their steeped tea. I also ordered a honey cruller donut and a chocolate chip muffin for my daughter. When we got to our vehicle I was contemplating where to get my long-time friend some breakfast. She had called me last night asking if I would bring her something. The donut shop has breakfast sandwiches similar to McDonald's egg Mcmuffin. My friend wanted more of a typical style breakfast so I decided against what was available at Tim's. I sat in the car and the lot beside us had McDonald's. I knew that they had what they call The Big Breakfast so I decided that I would get that for my friend. I could tell that my daughter didn't want to be late for her job which starts at 9:00 a.m. so I decided to drive on and find one closer to my friends house. There is always a McDonald's on main intersections.
McDonalds LogoI got to a stop sign and decided to start eating my donut as I was feeling a little hungry. To my surprise it was a honey glazed donut in the bag instead of honey cruller. I was dissappointed as my taste buds were looking forward to the cruller. Both of these donuts have a glaze on them so why my dissappoinment? The cruller is a different texture which is why I prefer it to the honey glazed. I was annoyed at the mistake made by the staff but of course I wasn't about to go back and get what I had ordered as my daughter had to be at work by 9:00 a.m.
I dropped my daughter outside of her workplace and carried on to my friend's house all the while trying to think of the nearest McDonald's to her home. Two came to my mind so I turned at the lights to the one closest to her house. I went in and ordered her breakfast. The staff said that the hash brown had 45 more seconds before it was ready. I stood there waiting patiently while he served another customer. He brought out the breakfast of scrambled eggs, sausage and an english muffin. It was in a styrofoam container with a nice lid on it. I had asked for extra strawberry jam which he had kindly put on top. I headed out the door. I got into my vehicle and started driving towards my friends house. I suddenly realized that I had not gotten the hash brown. This was the second time that morning that something had not gone as planned. I decided that it was not worth turning around and going back for a hash brown. I hoped that maybe the staff would eat it but I don't know the store policy. It is probably not allowed.
I decided on my drive to my friend's house that I wasn't going to let these minor inconveniences ruin my day even though each time I realized something hadn't gone as planned I was left with a feeling of irritation. My friend was really appreciative that I took the time to bring her some breakfast. She has a lot of health challenges so doesn't enjoy eating food all that much at times. She was enjoying my breakfast which made me feel good. It always does feel good to do something for someone else.
The events of the morning made me ponder how often in the past I have let minor inconveniences ruin my day. I have written about my daily life in previous blog posts but for those of you who are reading this blog post for the first time my husband suffers from Parkinson's disease. It is a daily battle not knowing from moment to moment how mobile he will be. He is in his fifteenth year with the disease and this year we have seen his health decline the most. He suffers from joint discomfort and the toes in his feet tend to curl inward which makes walking difficult. He moves around with the aid of a walker 99% of the time. He does venture out without it but it is generally not a good idea as he could get stuck somewhere in his travels as his body will stiffen up like a board. We try to stay within hearing distance so he can call for our help if needed. He keeps a bell near him and will ring us if he needs help or it is time to take his medication.
Caring for his needs has become a family project between myself and my twin daughters. I feel that we do a pretty good job and he acknowledges that he is fortunate enough to have us there for him. His illness has helped me see what is most important in life and to work on focussing on the important things in life and not get caught up in the minor inconveniences. When you see knew him when hecould flip a pizza into the air at his workplace to know not being able to manipulate cutlery it can be very upsetting. He becomes frustrated with the change in his physcial abilities but takes it day to day. I am lucky that he still looks for opportunities to raise the family's lifestyle as he is no longer able to work outside of the house. TogetherWeMakeAFamilyEvery day is a blessing because we don't know how much longer we have with each other. I realize that it is like that for any family but when you see a physical decline in someone that you love it is difficult. Going on outings has to be planned and sometimes postponed if his body is being unco-operative that particular day or moment in the day. We had an appointment at the bank and twice had to cancel because we couldn't get his shoes on to get into the car. We were wanting to have me added onto his bank account because for many years I have been doing his banking but have not been an official account holder. It was recommended by our life insurance agent that we do this as it is difficult to get things taken care of if something were to happen and we have bills that are paid out of his account. If someone does die, the account is frozen unless it is joint.
I have made some very bad financial decisions but I did take his advice so that we are ready for any more changes that might take place. Are you ready for changes in your life? Change is inevitable and as we age it becomes important to be prepared. My husband was diagnosed with Parkinson's at the age of 43 which is young but our daughter who is 25 is showing signs that she too may have Parkinson's.
Enjoy the time that you have as a family as life may throw you some curve balls. Snapshot_20121127_7 (2)Robert and Bethany Jobb Our Motto: "The Best Is Yet To Come!" MTTBbannerad-300x250-blink team-wukarjpgA group of people bringing the Ecommerce Revolution to consumers worldwide.